Happy Thursday!!! Thank goodness tomorrow is Friday.
I have been wanting to write a more vulnerable blog. A blog that keeps me honest and bit more real about my struggles, failures, and experiences that I have been through in my walk with Christ. You know the ones that go beneath the surface level, the not so pretty things. It can be so easy for us to talk about all the good things that go on in our life but when it comes to the painful things everyone wants to hide it, sweep it under the mat type of thing. Wherever you are in your walk with Christ, I want you to know that I confidently wouldn't have the strength I do today without going through some of the most painful trials in life. Although your Instagram might display differently, life isn't always filled with a beautiful aesthetic. Us humans go through some of the toughest battles through life.
As a Christian, following Jesus isn't constant sunshine and rainbows. It comes with many cloudy, rainy, and stormy days. I knew that I would have to go through the bad stuff to get to the good stuff. I knew that I would have to go through things in order to grow. On those stormy days I knew I was going to have to lean more on Him and His understanding than on my own. When things don't work out my way, I have to continuouly remind myself that it is His way and not my own. When things don't make sense I chose to know that it is Him who makes all things come together for the good. I have failed and I have failed miserably and through it all He has been the only One that has continuously sustained me. It's because of His love that I am forever abundantly loved even on the darkest days of this crazy life. I am going to be honest with you, fully living out your life in the eyes of Christ is hard. Staying at home binge watching The Office instead of going out with your friends on a Friday night is hard (Even though The Office is probably the greatest earthly thing). But, gals and guys let me tell you something, it is so worth it. I have learned so much about myself during those tough times. I have gained so much strength in who I am, what I want, and where I want to be in my walk with God.
Everything that I have gone through has made me understand God's amazing plans for me before I even know it. That God has my story written and my story matters because He is the Author of it. All the beautiful and broken parts that make up my story and make me who I am. All my failures, struggles, and selfishness He has already healed me and has set me free. My walk with Christ is the most important thing in my life. Putting God above all else is what I strive for, even through the messy times. And my walk is no where near perfection, there will always be something for me to learn from.
*Queue story time*
on February 7th, 2018 me and Jesus had a little fall out. I mean I literally fell. I was walking down my stairs at night and didn't bother to turn on any lights in this dark hallway (first mistake). I wasn't really paying attention to where I was stepping and I missed a step and my ankle rolled. I literally fell down the stairs I fell, I heard my ankle crack and all I could think in the back of my mind is, "well, that didn't sound good" It didn't. I was able to walk so that was a good sign. It hurt don't get me wrong but, it didn't hurt that bad.
I eventually went to the doctors the next day because it only seemed to be getting worse from there. The doctor couldn't really help me at all, it was only a severe sprain. I say only because I am lucky I didn't break it. The doctors "prescriptions" for me were to not put pressure on my ankle, lots of ice and elevation. Well over the next few days and weeks I was just trying to rush the healing process. I was so frustrated that I wasn't able to walk down my stairs on my own or even walk to class. I really wanted to be in control of everything, I wanted to be able to do things on my own without asking for help or having to use those different tools to help me.
I feel like we often do this with our relationship with God. As much as I wanted to rush the healing process on my ankle, it was going to take time. The more I walked on it without allowing my ankle to heal, the longer it was going to take. We do the same thing by continuously turning to those things or people that we know aren't healthy for our lives. By doing this, we are missing out on what He has in store for us because we are too busy focusing on what we think is good. If I have learned anything on 20 years of being on this earth is that His promises and plans are always better than whatever I have planned. His plans CRUSH and DOMINATE any plans I have ever set for myself. Don't rush what God is preparing your for in your season. Just like I was trying to rush my healing process, I was only making it worse. Do not rush what God already has planned for you, you would hate to miss out on something that God has planned. God's not done working in your life, don't ever stop waiting and walking with Him.
We all want to be at that point in our lives where everything you have gone through begins to make sense. I desperately want to be able to run again but I know it is going to take time. If I was to go out and run right now I could possibly risk the chance of actually breaking my ankle. The healing is going to take time, I don't want to rush it and end up worse than I was before. I say this because I don't want you to try and rush your plan and end up somewhere God didn't plan. That night I hurt my ankle I was in the midst of some of the most agonizing pain in my life. That week was one of the busiest weeks of my life in school and I remember being so stressed out about assignments, tests, anything school related you name it. On top of all of that I had to worry about my ankle and making sure that it was healing. Today, I am laughing at my little worries because God already had everything planned before I even knew it. I share this story as encouragement to let you know that we are all running the same race. We all go through stormy days when it feels like everything is going wrong and there's no way out. I promise their will be sunny days right around the corner. Sometimes we have to go through the bad stuff to get to the good stuff.
I pray that you are using your season to grow and strengthen. I pray you don't rush what He already has planned. I pray you know that whatever you are going through, it is for a reason. It can be so hard to see reasoning when you are stuck in the middle of a storm but know that after every storm there ALWAYS comes a rainbow :) Lastly, I pray that you give your life to Him knowing that you are found in Christ.
thx for reading!!:) & don't forget to subscribe before you leave!
